Energy Exists — How I Manage It
Energy is real, and I know this because for the longest time, I enjoyed my job and the people I worked with — then the inevitable change happened, new management, new energy. And don't get it twisted, change is not always negative. Personally, I love change, but sometimes change can make something go south, but that's the experiment of life, isn’t it? Three years ago, I started to slowly dissipate in my spirit and my desire to accomplish my work despite being one of the top performers (Cap Rising — IYKYK). Sound familiar?
Let’s be real — we are all feeling the crushing weight of producing at speed while the volume just keeps piling up. And here’s the shocker— you are not a machine. Although you may not realize it in the day in and day out, it is important to be able to recognize your magical value as simply being human. We are in a container that can easily hypnotize us to the point where we forget what the whole point of this life is about. The bills, the responsibilities, and the lure to keep up with the Joneses (which is a facade, you’ll never keep up), it’s all weighty and real — but what’s the cost? And ultimately, what's in your control?
I hit my breaking point 3 years ago, having to take a medical leave from work. I lost myself, I lost the spark and the brightness that others have always seen, I didn't recognize myself — I let the darkness around me consume me. Taking that step to take leave was one of the boldest and proudest moments of my life. For the first time, I had advocated for myself in a way that I knew I deeply needed. Being first-generation to Peruvian immigrants and the firstborn daughter, responsibility is all I’ve ever known, and not letting others down was how I was conditioned to live my life. And for the first time, in that moment, I decided to finally not disappoint myself.
Sadly, I sense this energy of so many people feeling the same way I did 3 years ago. The number of people I’m having conversations with about this saddens me, as so many environments can create some of the brightest people to become dim.
I want to share three things that have helped me manage my energy and remind me that I’m in the driver’s seat of my life while not forgetting my personal power to shine.
Morning and after-work rituals to manage energy. Every morning, I pull a card out of the Rest is Resistance Deck from Tricia Hersey. This deck grounds me at the start of my day to remind me of my humanity and my inherent value, that rest is my birthright. To close my day, there’s a hand sanitizer station by the elevators, and I grab some on my way out, rub my hands together, and say to myself, “Whatever I said and did here, stays here — the rest of this day is mine, and I will not carry the energies felt here.” These are just my examples, but I encourage you to find what works for you. Maybe your ritual is walking to get your morning coffee and making sure you have a tech-free moment to listen to the quiet. What is a song that pumps you up that you can listen to after the workday to reset? Experiment with it and see what feels aligned.
Schedule reflections with yourself. I know you’ve heard the classic, “How is it already X month? How did time go by so fast?” Time is going to pass, and month after month, my body was sending signals, and I didn’t check in with myself. Now, I make sure to be intentional every month with simple questions that I journal out. What gave me joy this month? What was difficult about this month? How did my energy feel? What changes do I need to make for the next month? What do I want to experiment with next month? What areas am I growing or feeling stunted in? How do I feel in my work environment? What do I have the power to change in that environment? These questions will give you a temp check of where you are at. Notice the patterns and take control of your journey.
Pack your bug-out bag. No one should ever feel stuck in a place that is impacting mental and physical health. The body truly keeps the score, and we are hurting ourselves if we continue to push through. So you create a bug-out bag. Packing the things you need to leave. How much savings do you need? What experiences/skills do you want to have? Make that list and refer to it often to make sure you’re packed.
My DMs are open, and we can usher in environments where all of us can shine, and like all things, we need the scheduled maintenance and tune-ups.